My top takeaways from Power of Now with Rachel Hollis, Tony Robbins, and others.
I have dreamt about seeing Rachel Hollis speak live ever since reading her book Girl, Wash Your Face in July of 2018.
Her book resonated with me, and a lot of things I was feeling or thinking. I also experienced a lot of “ah-ha” moments while reading it.
Rachel Hollis is one of the first women I’ve read about who was told that she couldn’t do something but persisted anyway until she accomplished her goal.
We hear about this story all the time with men. Michael Jordan being cut from his high school basketball team, Steve Jobs losing his company for a time, Jim Carey who started with nothing, The Rock who started with nothing, etc.
Now, I’m not saying that these stories aren’t inspiring or that there aren’t enough women who have stories about overcoming obstacles. What I’m saying is that stories about women overcoming obstacles aren’t shared as often as the stories about men who overcome obstacles. So Rachel’s story gave me hope as a woman that even though I’m experiencing challenges or may have people tell me that I can’t do something, I can choose to persist and achieve my goals anyway.
For me, reading Rachel’s book has given me immense power. Power that I already had access too, but didn’t know was there. I’ve continued to consumer Rachel’s content online because each time I learn something new.
When creating my Vision Board (or Dream Board) for 2019, I added my dream of seeing Rachel speak live.
An opportunity to attend a conference my company was hosting came up in June 2019, and Rachel Hollis was a keynote speaker. I couldn’t believe my luck! But when it came time to buy my ticket, I realized that I didn’t have enough money to buy my flight and accommodations.
So what appeared at the time to be THE moment I was supposed to hear Rachel Hollis speak live and fulfill one of my biggest dreams for 2019 wasn’t possible.
And then, I saw a Facebook ad. It said, “The Power of Success event: Tony Robbins and Friends.” And guess who was on that ad next to Tony Robbins? Yup. Rachel freaking Hollis!
The general seating ticket price was only $97 and the event was happening in the city where I lived, so hello no airfare or hotel. Perfect right? That’s what I thought too, except that I thought it was too perfect, like too good to be true. So I started searching the company who was hosting the event, and there were positive reviews, but also some negative reviews saying they canceled events within 3 days of it happening and refused refunds. I searched Tony and Rachel’s websites for mention of them being in Toronto for that event but didn’t see anything. Finally, I called the venue where the event was going to happen and the woman I spoke with said the deposit for the room hadn’t been paid yet, but the company running the event had hosted there before and that it was a legitimate event scheduled to happen.
So with that I decided to risk losing $97 if the event got canceled or whatever. But by then, the general seating price had gone up to $150. I was talking with a friend who wanted to attend the event with me and we both decided to pay the $150 tickets right then and there before prices went up any higher.
So April 1, 2019, I had booked one of my biggest dreams for October 30, 2019. Thinking about future me in October seeing Rachel Hollis live was unfathomable, and then October 29 rolled around.
It was midnight before I had packed my purse and gotten everything ready to wake up the next morning and Uber to the Power of Success event where I would hear Rachel Hollis speak live.
The next morning, while riding in my Uber, I got chills just thinking about accomplishing one of the biggest dreams on my Vision Board for 2019 - I was going to be in the same room as Rachel Hollis and hear her speak. It was going to change my life.
My Top Takeaways from Power of Success with
Tony Robbins and Friends
JOHN GRAY - AUTHOR OF MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
No one person can be or should be everything in your life.
Make sure you create what you’re here on earth to create.
You don’t always get what you want right away.
Spirit is not masculine or feminine - it’s both.
People want passion the most, but passion is empty without love in it.
If you’ve been out of balance for a while, like feeling overwhelmed or stressed, then being out of balance will feel more natural to you.
SONNI - THE HOW TO GIRL
A healthier lifestyle means breathing more oxygen, drinking more water, and eating more watery foods (like tomatoes, lettuce, onions, avocado) along with other food.
MOLLY BLOOM - AUTHOR OF MOLLY’S GAME
Statistically, she shouldn’t have done anything that she’s done. So don’t listen to what other people say you can’t do.
3 QUALITIES OF SUCCESS:
Mindset - meditation has helped her a lot. It allows her to silence the internal thoughts of “you can’t, you won’t” and disconnect from the outer world saying “you can’t, you won’t.”
Character - at the end of each day she does a character spot check. Was she brave? Was she kind? Was she punctual? Did she contribute to something bigger than herself?
Action - there is no replacement for action. Take action toward your goals.
JT FOXX - WEALTH COACH
50 good days out of 365 days means you will be successful. Most people give up because it feels like you’re having too many bad days, but if you quit you automatically lose.
5 THINGS THAT CONTRIBUTE TO SUCCESS:
Persistence - get back up after a fall.
Work Ethic - helps eliminate fear.
Commitment - do what you say you’ll do.
Loyalty - you can’t control someone’s loyalty, you have to earn it.
Attitude - it doesn’t matter what you do if you don’t have a good attitude about it you won’t enjoy it.
The #1 thing to be successful in business is branding.
The #1 thing that kills success is negativity. Evaluate the people in your life to see which ones are serving you more negativity and consider spending less time with those people.
Every 6 months you need to challenge yourself.
When making a decision, ask yourself:
What’s the best that can happen?
What’s the worst that can happen?
What’s the most realistic thing that will happen?
Then, only give yourself 5 seconds to make the decision. If you say that you have to think about it past 5 seconds, fear will take over your decision making.
GARY JOHN BISHOP - AUTHOR OF UNF*CK YOURSELF
All good transformations start by telling yourself the truth.
This is hard because we believe our own lies, and it feels difficult to sit with ourselves long enough to discover the truth.
Many of us like to blame other people or our circumstances for why we aren’t doing the things we know we should be doing, or continue to do things we know we shouldn’t be doing. The truth is that we are fighting against the little voice in our heads. We have a constant internal dialogue that is steering us and swaying our decisions.
We say that we’re too scared/anxious/confused to go after our goal, but we have to take a shot even while we have all those feelings. The only way to move past those feelings is to take the action. Taking the action is what will build the muscle for keeping our promises to ourselves.
When you make a promise to yourself, you’re not faced with the emotions or challenges. But when it comes time to keep your promise, we struggle in the moment.
The challenge is getting our actions to match our promises. If you had a friend who never kept promises to you, what would you think about them?
So, if you don’t keep your promises, what must you think about yourself?
And if deep down you think you’re full of sh*t, is it any wonder that you don’t believe in yourself?
You are dishonouring yourself and treating your word like it doesn’t matter when you fail to keep a promise to yourself. You need to keep the promises you make to yourself first above all else!
TAKE ACTION: Pick 1 thing that you’ve been tolerating but want to change. Give your word to changing it, and then keep that promise.
All the power in your life comes from honouring your promises.
Rachel Hollis
Seeing Rachel Hollis live on stage was amazing! I wasn’t super close to the stage, so she looked pretty small, but still. It was Rachel freaking Hollis in the same room as me speaking to all of us about how we didn’t need her to tell us anything or sell us anything - we have the power inside of us right now to change our lives.
SHE DID, HOWEVER, GO ON TO SHARE 5 REASONS WHY SHE HAS HAD SUCCESS:
1. SHE IS INTENTIONAL AF
If you aim at nothing, you are guaranteed to hit it every time. If you’re aiming at too many things at once, you won’t hit them. You gotta go all-in on 1 thing.
Evaluate:
The time you have
Where you’re going
How you need to show up for each day
How many of us remember setting goals at the New Year in 2010? What about in 2000? Can you believe that it’s already been 10 and 20 years since then? Even if you’re not intentional with your time, it is going to fly by without you. Create your roadmap now and run forward with intention.
2. SHE IS GRATEFUL AF
Every day she writes down 5 things that she is grateful for. When you spend your day looking for reasons to be grateful, you will find them.
We see life as we are. If we believe its a negative place, we’ll find negativity. If we believe it’s a positive place, we’ll find positivity. Choose to look for the good.
3. SHE IS COMFORTABLE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE
Being successful is hard and it takes hard work. Being a successful mom is hard work, being a successful career woman is hard work, being a successful friend is hard work. No matter what you want to be good at, it will take hard work.
You’ve heard all this before, but you just keep thinking there is a different way. There isn’t. To get what you want, it is going to take hard work. As soon as you claim your goal and take a step forward it is going to feel infinitely harder. That doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong.
The only thing that stands between you and your goal is your willingness to stick it out.
Most people will numb themselves or walk away because it feels easier than dealing with the hard work.
4. SHE ISN’T AFRAID TO FAIL
You’re not afraid of failure, you have an ego problem. You’re afraid of people seeing you fail.
Being afraid to go after your dream means you’re already at NO. If you fail at something, you can just try again. If you’re feeling afraid to fail, you’re tying success to your self-worth.
We think having more money and more success will make us a better version of ourselves, but it won’t. You can’t buy character or love so don’t lose sight of what’s important while you’re chasing your dreams.
Instead of being afraid, try failing on purpose. Actively do things where you know you’re most likely to fail. This will take the fear away.
5. SHE STANDS BACK UP
Everything you want to know is available on Google for free. Therefore, ignorance is a choice at this point. You are choosing to stay in this place because it’s comfortable.
It doesn’t get easier to be knocked down, but you get a thicker skin.
You need to stop drowning yourself in what other people think about you.
Don’t get to the end of your life and think, “I could have …”
Live every day like it’s your last chance to leave your mark.
TONY ROBBINS
Will power will never last. You have to train yourself and create a habit of implementation.
THE 3 LEVELS OF MASTERY:
Cognitive Understanding
Emotional Mastery
Physical Mastery
Without energy, you won’t be able to pursue your goals, so you have to train yourself to create energy.
On a scale of 0 (dead) and 10 (unstoppable), how would you rate your energy level?
Would you date, do business with, or be inspired by a person with the number you gave?
How does someone with that level of energy think and act?
If you don’t train yourself, you’re going to get stuck with other people’s thoughts in your head.
The average person isn’t fit, earning the money they want to earn, or in a passionate and loving relationship. We think it’s difficult to train at the level required to get those things, but the reality is that we’ve trained ourselves to do what we’re currently doing.
Momentum is the most powerful tool for success. It takes more energy to start than it does to maintain. The most powerful way to get momentum is to create it in your mind vividly first.
What you focus on you feel. So focus = feeling. If someone was late for a date with you, you might feel angry that they stood you up or worried that they got in an accident. You have no confirmation about either reason, but if you focus on what you think is happening and give that focus a feeling you will experience that feeling. If/when the person arrives, you will greet them in a very different way if you are feeling angry or if you’re feeling worried. We don’t treat people based on reality, we treat them based on what we’re feeling.
Suffering is beating yourself up for not being where you think you should be by now. How do you think your energy is impacted when you’re beating yourself up about this? As your energy decreases, your chances of achieving your goals decreases. So create certainty or belief by visualizing yourself achieving your goals and focus on the positives.
When do people really start living? When they’ve faced death.
Change can happen in a moment AND last if you condition the change.
Tony Robbins was me, but I also created him. And you can create the best version of yourself too.
Everything you want comes from resourcefulness. There is no lack except for that thought.
Life is the dance between what you desire most and what you fear most.
Instead of looking for a leader in your life, be one. Lead yourself first.
When you achieve a goal you’re working toward, how long will you celebrate it? Maybe for 2 hours or up to 60 days. Could you experience the same feelings now? Yes. It’s not going to be achieving the goal that makes you happy, it’s who you become on your way to that goal that makes you happy.
You don’t need a reason to feel good. Train yourself to celebrate for no reason. You can train yourself to enter a specific state automatically without thinking about it. Jumping and dancing help change your state.
Think of your brain as a computer. You can program it to focus on what you have or what’s missing. If your brain is programmed to focus on what’s missing, how will it find what you have?
You can program your brain to focus on what you can control or what you can’t control. You’ll feel a lot better if you program it to focus on the things you can control.
You can program your brain to focus on what you want or what you don’t want. You’ll get what your brain focuses on.
Noticing the things we have (gratitude) and feeling like we have some control makes us happy.
Everything in your life can be changed by shifting your focus and physiology (state).
You can focus on what you have or what’s missing.
When you implement positive changes, there will be a lag time. You won’t get immediate results. You have to keep implementing the positive changes anyway.
Focus is Power.
Choose 2 things you want to have happen in the next 90 days to 6 months. Make it one business-related goal and one personal goal.
Why MUST you achieve those two things?
What’s kept you from achieving those things in the past?
What needs to change now in order for you to achieve them?
Society rewards achievement, it doesn’t reward fulfillment. But success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure.
You gotta find what fulfills you or everything else is a waste.
You’ve gotta find your way.
We feel alive when we’re growing and giving.
Wrapping Up Power of Success with Tony Robbins and Friends
You guys. Just like that. A big dream of mine can be summed up in one (rather long) blog post.
I literally wrote down in my notebook as it hit me:
“Huge dream coming true. I’m in the same room as Rachel Hollis and Tony Robbins. Holy sh*t.”
This is often what dreams actually look like. Other people’s heads in the way, lots of chatter and distraction around you. You watching the screen as if it’s Rachel on your iPhone instead of watching the small person live on stage who is your big hero in real life.
But seeing Rachel Hollis and Tony Robbins in person was also a slap in the face. These are other people, just like me. They seem larger than life when I consume their content online and read their books. But seeing them in person it is painfully obvious that they are just another human being. And if this dream of mine can come true, that means that all my other dreams can come true as well - but the only thing standing in the way is me.
I wanted the Power of Success event with Rachel Hollis to change my life.
But it won’t.
I have to be the one to change my life.
I knew this going in, but just like Rachel said, I held onto hope that there had to be an easier way. There had to be a shortcut that I could buy or a magic button I could press.
Nope. There’s no magic. And literally the moment you leave that event room - or even just the moment the final speaker is done, real-life can smack you in the face.
YOUR LIFE WON’T CHANGE UNLESS YOU CHANGE IT. AND YOU HAVE EVERYTHING YOU NEED ALREADY IN ORDER TO MAKE THOSE CHANGES THAT WILL GIVE YOU THE LIFE YOU SAY YOU WANT.
All day today, one day post the event, I have felt emotionally hungover.
If you commit to doing the internal work that must be done in order to face your truths, set your goals, and really do the work even when things get hard, it’s going to suck along the way. But that’s what it takes to live your life on purpose.
Build yourself a tribe of inspiring people who all want to do the hard work. Cheer each other on through the good times and the hard times. Keep pushing forward. Help each other in times of need. Remind each other of the reasons why you’re choosing to do these challenging things when it would feel so much easier to sit down and watch tv.
You matter. Your life matters. Today matters.
What is it that you really want from your life?
Go and make that happen!